You Might Be a ____________ If... #1

I begin a series today entitled, You Might Be a ___________ If... It will be an opportunity for all of us from different Christian traditions to poke a little light-hearted fun at ourselves. As I am a United Methodist, it is only right that we begin with my tradition.

Please feel free to post your own "You might be..." statements.

You might be a United Methodist if...

1. the word "apportionments" sends a chill down your spine.

2. you don't take Rolaids when your heart is strangely warmed.

3. you sit while singing "Stand Up, Stand Up for Jesus."

4. The Upper Room is as important for your bathroom as toilet paper.

5. tithing is encouraged but widely ignored.

6. you form a committee to decide whether you should form a committee.

7. your travelling evangelists preach against "back-sliding" and practice it at the same time.

8. you keep the Book of Discipline and the Book of Resolutions on the shelf next to your Bible.

9. the notion of holiness is a long and distant memory in your history.

10. you know that a circuit rider is not a piece of electrical equipment.