Irrelevant Facts for Irrelevant Conversation

Some irrelevant facts that will convince your friends that you are a treasure trove of completely useless information:

-A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off--it dies from starvation!

-The electric chair was invented by a dentist!

-George Washington grew marijuana in his garden.

-If you put a raisin in a glass of champagne, it will keep floating to the top and sinking to the bottom.

-It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

-Non-dairy creamer is flammable.

-Snails can sleep for 3 years without eating.

-The car in the foreground on the back of a $10 bill is a 1925 Huptmobile.

-There are no rivers in Saudi Arabia.

-Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

-Cat urine glows under a black-light!

-Over 10,000 birds a year die from smashing into windows!

-A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.

-Ancient Egyptians shaved off their eyebrows to mourn the deaths of their cats.

-It is illegal to be a prostitute in Siena, Italy if your name is Mary.

-Lady Astor once told Winston Churchill "if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee." His reply... "if you were my wife, I would drink it!"

-Montpelier, Vermont is the only U.S. state capital without a McDonald's.

-Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

-The screwdriver was invented before the screw.

Want more information on any of these?-- Just Google it.

Yale Theologian Miroslav Volf Preaches at the Crystal Cathedral

Opinion Central Poll 2009.47: Final Results

Is President Obama keeping his promise for greater transparency in government?

A Prayer for the Eleventh Sunday in Kingdomtide

Blessed Lord, who has caused all holy Scriptures to be written for our learning: Grant that we may in such wise hear them, read, mark, learn, and inwardly digest them, that, by patience and comfort of your holy Word, we may embrace and ever hold fast the blessed hope of everlasting life, which you have given us in our Savior Jesus Christ; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

The Book of Common Prayer

The Methodist Blogs Weekly Roundup 2009.29.208

Submit your post to umweeklyroundup@yahoo.com by noon EST on Saturday to guarantee that your post is included.

The week in review in the Methoblogosphere:

Andrew Thompson writes on the power of Holy Communion.

Dave Nichols posts on All Saints' Sunday and grief.

Bishop Robert Schnase on missing the recognition of the moment.

Thoughts on pastoral leadership in stewardship according to Bishop William Willimon.

Reflections from Brian Vinson on being alone.

Sally Coleman is in search of a new way.

You better hurry-- Mark Winter's One Man Show is booking fast!

Dave Faulkner asks, "Is Steve Jobs a model for preachers?"

Brian Russell offers his top ten Bible passages.

Michael Daniel writes on rights vs. right.

The agenda of the Holy Spirit-- some thoughts from Ken Carter.

Dave Perry is dredging up the past to replenish the present and shape the future.

Jim Parsons cogitates on being called by God and sharing our stories.

Seasons (of the gospel) and the church-- reflections from Andy Bryan. Best of the Methoblogosphere!

Olive Morgan reminds us that Christmas is coming.

Andrew Stoddard posts reflections on Ezra 7:1-16, Revelation 14:1-13, and Matthew 14:1-12.

Are you now or have you ever been?... well, get the rest of the question from Tony Mitchell.

Kim Matthews ponders our status as refugees.

Greg Hazelrig posts his thought for the day on John 21:15.

Steve Heyduck on giving advice.

Deb Spaulding is hangin' out with Hezekiah.

There is evidence of life for Questing Parson.

John Meunier posts on making the church younger.

Some thoughts on God in the ordinary from Lorna Koskela.

Daniel McLain Hixon shares his thoughts on evangelism by trendiness. Best of the Methoblogosphere!

Joseph Yoo comments on why Scripture is important.

Henry Neufeld issues a note on independent voters.

Reflections on listening and speaking out from Angela Shier-Jones.

Dan Dick writes on running church.

Joseph Slife reports on the Judicial Council's recent decisions on a sexuality statement and apportionments.

Mitch Lewis preaches on the wheat and the tares together sown.

David Hallam is troubled by Jesus, Queen of Heaven.

When you die, will you have a digital executor? Read Gavin Richardson.

"Giving Thanks: For All the Saints"-- a sermon by Beth Quick.

Rick Mang tells us that a friend of his recently met a hero of his.

What Independents Want

An excellent editorial by David Brooks.

The Myth of the Good Old Days

There's lots of bad stuff going on in the world today. A natural worrywart would have a feast wigging out over what is happening in the world and right here in the good ole' U.S. of A. How many times I hear people speaking of the good old days, of simpler times when life wasn't so complicated, when it was safe to let children run free in public and when everyone supposedly went to church every Sunday.

I dissent from such a view. There is no such thing as the good ole' days. It is a myth constructed by people with amnesia who have forgotten or have chosen not to remember the problems and perils of earlier days. Allow me to offer some evidence:

-An estimated 20% of American children live in poverty today. More lived in poverty in 1900 and an estimated 20% lived in orphanages because their parents couldn't afford them.

-In the nineteenth century the age of sexual consent in several states was nine or ten.

-In the 1920s, no law required a divorced father to pay child support.

-Near the end of 1943, Life Magazine ran an article on juvenile delinquency which highlighted among other things, teenagers smoking marijuana and teenage girls waiting to be picked up by soldiers. The article states, "Too many Victory Girls believe it is part of patriotism to deny nothing to servicemen."

-At the beginning of the Civil War, there were proportionately as many abortions being performed annually as there are today.

-The murder rate in the 1930s was as high as in the 1980s.

-In the earlier part of the twentieth century, divorce rates were not nearly as high as they are today, but comparatively the rates of desertion and domestic violence were much higher than in the twenty-first century.

-Today approximately two-thirds of Americans do not go to church. In the nineteenth century the percentage was... two-thirds.

-Preacher and theologian Jonathan Edwards was criticized by fellow Christians for being too stuffy when it came to sexual morality.

-In the period of the American Revolution, it was not uncommon for an engaged couple to have sex prior to marriage.

-The child sex slave trade was just as prevalent one hundred years ago as it is today.

-It is estimated that in the middle of the nineteenth century, there was one prostitute for every 64 men in New York City.

-With all the talk about the problems of health care in the U.S., would anyone prefer the medical practices of 1910? (By the way, the greatest factor for the longer life spans in the developed world today is not the result of today's medicine, but modern methods of sanitation.)

-We talk about pollution today, but one hundred years ago people thought nothing of dumping all kinds of things into streams and lakes and blowing toxic smoke into the air.

-We understandably are concerned about all the additives put in food today, but one hundred and fifty years ago, food poisoning from "all-natural" foods was much more common than it is today.

I could go on and on, but instead I will simply list some sources below where much more information and examples can be obtained.

None of this is to suggest that everybody was wicked and rotten a hundred years ago. There were plenty of good and decent people then as there are now. But we must dispel ourselves of the notion that there was some golden era in American history (or any history for that matter) when all was pure and pristine, wonderful and lovely. Along with that we must also reject the belief that everything is much worse today than it was "back then." This does not mean we should fail to take our problems and challenges seriously, but a little less of "the sky is falling" hysteria would be a good thing... and unfortunately, we have too many "Chicken Littles" cackling around us.

---

Selected Sources

Dean Merrill, Sinners in the Hands of an Angry Church. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 1997

Stephanie Coontz, The Way We Never Were: American Families and the Nostalgia Trap. Basic Book, 1992.

Life Magazine 15, No. 25 (20 December 1943).

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Cross-Posted at RedBlueChristian

Truth is Stranger than Fiction 2009.22

Ohio police say man dressed as Breathalyzer for Halloween accused of DUI

Nov 4, 4:47 PM EST

OXFORD, Ohio (AP) -- An Ohio man dressed as a Breathalyzer test for Halloween found himself blowing into one after police stopped him for allegedly driving the wrong way without headlights on a one-way street. Oxford police said they stopped 20-year-old James P. Miller on Halloween night and found beer in his front seat and in the trunk.

Police said Miller blew 0.158 percent on a Breathalyzer test. The legal limit for driving is a blood-alcohol level of .08.

Miller was cited on charges including operating a vehicle while intoxicated, underage possession of alcohol, having an open container and a fake ID, and a one-way street violation.

Miller had no comment when reached at home Wednesday.

Elections Are Never Mandates

Yesterday's elections results are now being spun by both political parties to their advantage. Most Democrats are minimizing losing two governorships in Virginia and New Jersey, while Republicans are hailing their victories as a shot across the bow at Democrats in Congress and President Obama. In truth, both sides are overplaying their hand, which should not be surprising. Nevertheless, Republicans have reason to be happy today, though their celebration should be guarded, and Democrats ought to be concerned, although they are hardly on the path to minority party status.

The first lesson that politicians should have learned a long time ago but have not, is that, contrary to popular political mythology, elections are never mandates from the American people. Yes, there are those partisans on both sides who want their party to ram their agenda down the collective throat of the country come hell or high water, but most voters are not so ideologically driven. For the most part, elections are not expressions of confidence in someone or one group of politicians as they are a no confidence vote in those who fail to get elected. The reason the Republicans controlled all facets of government up until 2006 was because the American people lacked confidence in the Democratic party to govern. In 2006, we began to see the public's lack of trust in the Republicans. Thus, the 2008 election that swept the Democratic party into the White House along with bigger majorities on Capitol Hill, was not a show of support for those elected as much as a no-confidence vote in those who had been in office. Change elections are really a "get rid of the bums" kind of event. Yes, I know that there were more than a few, particularly young people, who were part of the "Obama Messianic Movement," but most supporters of President Obama are more realistic and down-to-earth. Unfortunately, what has happened in the last year is that the Democratic party, newly in power, has assumed, on account of their hubris, that the American people have given them a mandate for their agenda, for their political program. Such an extreme approach to governing is starting to result, ever so slowly in another "get rid of the bums" election now directed at the other side of the aisle.

But what yesterday's results reveal is that the American people will not tolerate politicians gone wild in either foreign or domestic policy. The American people were fed up with George W. Bush's hubris on foreign policy, and yesterday they indicated that they are not pleased with the hubris shown by President Obama and the Democrats in the last ten months on domestic affairs. If the Republicans think that the gaining of two governorships now means that "new winds are blowing" as RNC Chair Michael Steele said this morning, they over-estimate what the American people think of the Republican Party's ability to govern in all matters. At the same time, if the Democrats interpret yesterday's results only as the public's frustration at their inability to put forward their agenda on health care, etc., they have badly misunderstood that a segment of the American people, who are likely representative of a certain cross-section of the country, have only one year after an historic election, sent a not-so-subtle message to them that their election did not mean a mandate in support of more government control of the private sector and the mortgaging of their children's and grand children's future in wild deficit spending.

Elections are never mandates; they are temporary charges given to a few people by many people, who expect those so elected to govern humbly and reasonably. If politicians and political parties took themselves and their views less seriously, they might, at some point, come to understand this.

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Cross-Posted at RedBlueChristian

Opinion Central Poll 2009.46: Final Results

Do you prefer to watch the NFL or college football?

Reflections on Revelation #5: Worship in the Heavenly Court

Revelation 4

The fourth chapter of Revelation is the beginning of a vision in the throne-room of heaven. John indeed uses the language of vision, which does not suggest that he has been actually transported into heaven itself. It is more than a mental image, but neither is it a change of location.

The vision of the creatures in heaven is obviously rooted in the context of the Old Testament-- Ezekiel and Isaiah. The identity of the twenty-four elders bowing in worship has been debated. It can represent an angelic order in heaven that compliments the twenty-four priestly and levitical orders of 1 Chronicles (24:4; 25:9-13). Others suggest that the twenty-four elders represent the whole people of God as represented by the twelve tribes of Israel and the twelve apostles, who signified Jesus' intention to reconstitute the people of God in his ministry.

The scene in Revelation 4 clearly is one of power and majesty. God is on his throne and in charge. The God of Israel is not a pretender deity demanding worship from his subjects; this God is worthy of worship because he is indeed God. At the beginning of John's apocalyptic vision, his hearers are comforted by the worship of God in the heavenly court. In the midst of trials and tribulations they are reminded that those who oppress them will face justice in God's appointed time. In verse 11 the twenty-four elders shout in worship, "You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honour and power." The Roman historian Suetonius tells us that this was essentially the same greeting given by Roman subjects to the Emperor Domitian as he arrived in triumphant procession. The message at the end of chapter four is too obvious to be missed. Only the one true God is worthy of such honor and glory. Domitian's divine pretensions are blasphemous.

Faithful Foundations (Belated Thoughts on All Saints' Day)

Hebrews 11

So often we think that the only real impact made in life and in society and in the church come from those who do things that make the headlines. When we read our history books, we are told mostly about the great leaders and those who have become famous because they have blazed new trails. We know of Lewis and Clark, but not of the countless men and women who ventured out on the American frontier stepping out into the unknown armed only with a dream and a few provisions. Even though we do not know most of those pioneers, nevertheless they made quite a difference in the settling of our nation. Those unknown and seemingly insignificant settlers made quite a difference in our history.

On All Saints' Day, we remember those believers who made quite a difference in our lives. These persons may not go down in the history books for subsequent generations to read about and reflect upon, but their ordinary faith has made an extraordinary impact on us, and we are right to remember them. Indeed, we are obligated to reflect on their lives and their faith.

Hebrews chapter 11 has been referred to as the Great Hall of Faith. The writer of the letter highlights for us the great faith and, therefore, faithfulness of many of our Old Testament figures from Abraham to Moses, from David to Deborah. In spite of their frailties, they nevertheless stepped out in faith and their influence ripples throughout history. We could not fulfill our responsibilities as God's people had they not accomplished theirs.

One of the pitfalls we often fall into as we reflect upon these faithful saints that we read about in the Bible is that somehow they were superhuman in what they accomplished. They did great things because they were great; and when we compare our perception of them with us and our lives, we think we cannot possibly live up to their example. They were heroes, we are not.

But such a view misinterprets Hebrews chapter 11. All the people that our author highlights are worthy of mention, not because they were extraordinary individuals; rather, they are singled out because they were ordinary people who, in spite of their fears and their failings, stepped out in faith nonetheless in order to be obedient to God. Hebrews 11 consistently reminds us that what these individuals accomplished was "by faith."

On All Saints' Day, we remember those who have passed from us and this earthly existence, and have now moved into glory right alongside of the great women and men of Hebrews chapter 11; and in our remembrances of them, we place them into Hebrews chapter 11 as models of the life of faith. Their example encourages us to live today and tomorrow, and each and every day, in faith as the evidence of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

We remember those who lives constructed a firm and faithful foundation for us to move forward in faith. In so doing, we are reminded that our task is to lay a firm and faithful foundation for those who come after us in faith, that they too might glorify God.

A Prayer for All Saints' Day

Almighty God, who has knit together your elect in one communion and fellowship in the mystical body of Your Son, Christ our Lord: Give us grace so to follow Your blessed saints in all virtuous and godly living, that we may come to those ineffable joys that you have prepared for those who unfeignedly love you; through the same Jesus Christ our Lord, who with you and the Holy Spirit lives and reigns, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen.

Book of Common Prayer

The Methodist Blogs Weekly Roundup 2009.28.207

Submit your post to umweeklyroundup@yahoo.com by noon EST on Saturday to guarantee that your post is included.

The week in review in the Methoblogosphere:

Dave Nichols gets a lesson on maturity at the dermatologist.

Mitch Lewis writes about the mighty fortress on Reformation Day.

Bishop Robert Schnase posts on work without boundaries.

The truth and Natural Church Development from Bishop William Willimon. Best of the Methoblogosphere!

Mitch Lewis writes on serving the Table of the Lord.

Kevin Watson reflects on the crisis of cynical younger clergy.

John Montgomery reviews Marcus Borg's Conversation with Scripture on the Gospel of Mark.

A report from Joseph Slife on the UM Judicial Council's upcoming ruling on the sexuality resolution of the Baltimore-Washington Conference and the Western North Carolina's "Choice Empowerment" on apportionments.

When teaching becomes task according to Dan Dick.

Corporate disciples? Read Angela Shier-Jones.

Henry Neufeld ponders publishing books in the search for truth.

Kim Fabricius offers a postscript on evangelical universalism.

Joseph Yoo writes on why tradition is important.

Some thoughts on the Methodist-Lutheran Unity Statement from Daniel McLain Hixon.

Richard Heyduck offers three cheers for failure.

Lorna Koskela reflects on worship.

John Meunier posts on 1 Samuel 5 and the doorway to Dagon.

Old but dependable-- a narration from Questing Parson.

Tiffany Steinwert comments on equality across America.

Matt Kelley cogitates on the newly passed hate crimes bill.

Dorothy Brucks is on assignment.

Would YOU buy what you're selling? Steve Heyduck asks the question.

Greg Hazelrig posts his thought for the day on Galatians 5:16.

Kim Matthews writes on radical new beginnings.

Tony Mitchell is interested in a new dialogue.

Andrew Stoddard posts reflections on Ezra 5:1-17, Revelation 4:1-11 and Matthew 13:1-19.

Olive Morgan announces the Second Synchronised Blogging Day.

Is it possible to alter what God has made perfect? Read Andy Bryan.

Andrew Thompson asks, "Do you have a calling?"

Jim Parsons preaches on the raising of Lazarus.

Thoughts from Dave Perry on keeping Christ safe and... behind bars.

Jeremy Smith begins his review of Glo: The Bible for a Digital World.

Shane Raynor is a weekly Communion convert.

Should Christians care about climate change? Ken Carter shares his thoughts.

"The Nature of Commitment"-- a sermon by Michael Daniel.

Brian Russell challenges us to ask, "Who is my mission?" Best of the Methoblogosphere!

Dave Faulkner affirms that in Christ alone his hope is found.

Mark Winter writes on Red Ribbon School Shows.

Ponderments on prayer from Sally Coleman.

Brian Vinson posts on truth-telling.

William Chaney is moving beyond procrastination.

Opinion Central Poll 2009.45: Final Results

Is it OK for Christians to celebrate Halloween?

N.T. Wright on What Happens After We Die

Reflections on Revelation #4: Letters to Seven Churches (Continued)

Revelation 2:18-3:22

The longest address is directed at the church of Thyatira. If Ephesus was the most important of the seven cities, Thyatira was the least among them. It was founded as a military outpost by Seleucis I. Like most of the other churches the risen Christ recognized their works, but like their brothers and sister in Pergamum, the Thyatiran Christians were culpable in gross accommodation with their surrounding pagan context. They must hold on and be faithful until the Second Coming; otherwise the consequences will be severe.

Of the seven churches, Sardis came under the harshest condemnation. The church's compromises with its pagan environment were apparently no cause for concern among the Christians there. It seemed untroubled by outside opposition, but that was likely because it had no trouble tolerating and perhaps even approving heresy and other things quite contrary to the gospel. They were living like pagans, so their "Christianity" was quite inoffensive, which led to the charge that they were spiritually dead. There remained a minority who had not compromised their faith, but the majority had fallen into such a severe state of compromise, that only confession and repentance could return their spiritual life and vitality to them.

Only the churches at Smyrna and Philadelphia received unqualified praise from the risen Christ. The letter mentions that the Philadelphian Christians had little power suggesting that their congregation was quite small and, therefore, did not have much influence in the surrounding community. However, what was made clear was the tension between the Christians and the Jews of the city. It may be that the Jews objected to the Christians' claim to the religious heritage and identity and the inheritance of the people of God apart from the taking of the yoke of the Mosaic Law. The Christians are told to overcome and they will be made a pillar in the temple of God, an image that conveys stability and is an integral part of God's work. It also denotes God's acceptance of the Philadelphian Christians even though they are Gentiles.

The church at Laodicea is popularly referred to as the church of the end times by those who see the seven churches as representing seven ages of church history. This is primarily because the church in the West is seen by many today as a church that has seriously compromised the gospel. The problem with this view is that Laodicea is not the only church of the seven that are condemned for compromise, and even a superficial reading of church history reveals that the church has struggled with compromise from the beginning. This view also assumes that the most significant part of the world church today is to be found in Europe and North America. The church in Africa and Latin America and Asia is not in general decline nor has it fallen in love with the spirit of the age like many churches in North America and Europe. The church on the three continents of developing nations is currently exploding in growth and acting courageously in mission.

Laodicea was known as a city of medicine. It was quite famous for an eye-salve that was exported throughout the Roman Empire. So the irony cannot be missed that those Christians who gave healing to the eyes of so many were themselves spiritually blind. The most difficult problem for the population at Laodicea was an inadequate water source. Water was brought in through stone pipes from several miles away. Moreover, mineral-laden water from hot springs six miles north of the city flowed nearby. By the time the water reached Laodicea, it had cooled and was lukewarm. The minerals from the spring combined with the tepid temperature made the water quite difficult to drink. The risen Christ insists to the Laodiceans that their lukewarm faith is as nauseating to him as the tepid and disgusting water they would only drink if forced, but was only fit to be spit out on the ground.

Letting the Permission Givers Give Permission Is Always Counter-Productive

We all know them-- they are in our churches, our places of employment, our civic organizations, and our government. In fact, they are everywhere. They are the permission givers, that is people who, even though they do not have official responsibility for a task, have taken it upon themselves to make sure what is done is acceptable to them so that nothing can happen until they give their consent.

Permission givers usually have strong personalities and take an intimidating posture toward those who want to accomplish something, though most of the time the permission giver is quite unaware of his or her mode of operation. It does not matter if the permission giver is knowledgeable about the task before the group or not-- he or she always knows what is best, and they will suck out of the room all the air of enthusiasm. Permission givers must not be given permission to be permission givers.

I have been in situations where a permission giver has been allowed by the group to grind everything to a halt because she or he was sure that those who had spent time researching a matter were wrong and there was a better way of doing something or saving money or whatever it might be. Permission givers demoralize people who are committed to the betterment of something and good volunteers in the church simply give up and fade away into the pews. Most of the time, however, it is the permission giver who doesn't know what she or he is talking about.

In the church the permission givers will slow down if not stop entirely new and exciting ministries. They do not do this by giving a flat-out "No;" they will argue there is a better way to do something or that something should be done, but it should be different from what is suggested. I have seen permission givers in the church set about the task of demonstrating that something could be done better or more cheaply, but in reality only waste more time and money in the process. Permission givers spend a dime to save a nickel.

Permission givers have boundary issues. They think everyone's territory belongs in part to them, so they feel free to impose themselves into someone else's job or responsibility. They are indeed trying to be helpful, but what they cannot see is how much they are simply in the way. Permission givers have an emotional need to be approving of others.

Permission givers need to be marginalized from the responsibility of decision-making. They can certainly have productive ministry in the church, but if they are allowed to have their way on most things, the church will find itself discourage, demoralized, and spinning its wheels in ministry.

ATS Fall Lecture Series

I won't be blogging today and tomorrow. Ashland Seminary is hosting my friend, Scot McKnight for our annual Fall Lecture Series. I will be gleaning from his wisdom on the Gospels.

A Prayer for Reformation Sunday

Lord God of hosts, the Refuge of every sinner and the Strength of all who put their trust in you, we praise you for having made us partakers of the blessings of the Reformation. Without any merit on our part, you have sent your Holy Spirit into our hearts and brought us to faith in your dear Son, Jesus Christ. You have made known to us the worthlessness of our own good deeds and the perfect merit of Christ. You have directed our faith away from the commandments of men and cause us to rest our hope only and solely on the exceedingly great and precious promises of your Gospel. You have revealed the beauty of your grace, which rescued us from a just condemnation and assured us of certain salvation in Christ. Grant us your grace that we may receive your forgiveness with thanksgiving and reflect your mercy in thanks-living. Use us as your witnesses in bringing the message of pardon in Christ to our fellow men everywhere. Open our eyes to a better understanding of your Word and a deeper appreciation of your grace that our faith in Christ Jesus may grow and flourish with the fruits of righteous living. Grant purity of doctrine and practice to you. Amen.